Married Women Struggle With REAL ID: Bureaucracy Blocks Name Change Proof

With the May 7th REAL ID deadline breathing down our necks, married women across the country are finding themselves tangled in a paperwork web that’s almost as old as some of their marriages. The main snag? Proving their married name without the original marriage certificate – and, no, a notarized copy apparently just won’t cut it.

Dorothy Ballone, who got married 67 years ago in Rochester, New York, has been on a quest that would tire Indiana Jones. She thought she had all her documents in order: Social Security card, birth certificate, proof of address, and the all-important marriage license. But when she handed a certified copy to the DMV, it was promptly rejected. They wanted the ‘original’ document – which, after nearly seven decades, is about as easy to find as a winning lottery ticket.

Her journey took her from her local church (no luck there; they don’t keep records that far back), to various clerks’ offices, and even to the Diocese of Rochester. The city finally sent her a certified license, but that, too, was turned down. Despite living under her married name for decades and having a perfectly valid driver’s license, the state wants nothing less than the original marriage certificate. Talk about bureaucracy with commitment issues.

Dorothy isn’t alone. Neighbors and women in other states report the same hassle. Alicia from Minneapolis, for example, found herself making repeat DMV trips with a baby in tow, all because she was missing the elusive marriage certificate. Being a stay-at-home mom, she didn’t have the usual forms of ID, making the process even more complicated.

With the clock ticking toward the May 7 deadline, these women are scrambling to find documents that, in some cases, predate color television. The TSA, naturally, said it’s a state issue, leaving applicants stuck in a paperwork limbo.

If you’re a married woman with a name change – and your marriage certificate is somewhere in a dusty attic or long-lost church file – you might want to start your scavenger hunt now. The DMV won’t accept a love letter as proof, no matter how sweet.