Trump’s Nine-Front War: The Art of Multitasking Mayhem

President Donald Trump is waging a nine-front war, and if you blink, you might miss a new battlefield opening up. Rather than focusing on one or two issues like presidents of the past, Trump’s White House is running at breakneck speed, upending tradition and taking on the country’s most entrenched institutions.

The approach is clear: challenge the elite, disrupt the status quo, and keep everyone guessing. Supporters call it shaking things up; critics call it chaos. Either way, the sheer pace is dizzying. It’s the Trump presidency, but with even more caffeine.

Loyalists surround Trump, encouraging his go-big-or-go-home tactics. Gone are the days of advisors holding him back. Now, it’s open season on anything and everything, from major policy fights to, yes, shower pressure. And let’s not forget his trusty megaphone, Truth Social, always ready for a presidential vent session.

So, what are these nine battlegrounds?

1. Top Private Universities
Despite having a Wharton pedigree, Trump has unleashed a full-court press on Ivy League schools. Harvard is feeling the heat, with billions in federal funding frozen and the IRS sniffing around its tax-exempt status. After an "unauthorized" letter from the White House, Harvard leaders found themselves blindsided in the middle of negotiations.

2. Law Firms
Major law firms are being squeezed to provide up to $125 million in pro bono work for the administration—or risk losing security clearances essential to their business. Some lawyers have quit in protest, but most are making deals to avoid the White House’s legal wrath.

3. Media
Trump is in and out of court with the likes of CBS, NBC, Gannett, and ABC—winning a hefty payout from Disney after a defamation case. He’s also not shy about roasting reporters who cross him, even as he grants the press daily access. The love-hate relationship is still going strong, and let’s be honest, it’s a ratings bonanza for everyone involved.

4. Federal Reserve
The president has gone on the offensive against Fed Chair Jerome Powell, pushing him to resign while the markets swing wildly. Tariffs are flying, allies are grumbling, and the global economy is holding its breath. Trump claims he can strike deals with 90 countries in 90 days—talk about an ambitious calendar.

5. Courts
Never one to shy from confrontation, Trump is pushing the limits with judges and prosecutors, sometimes ignoring Supreme Court rulings altogether. When the court told him to facilitate Kilmar Abrego Garcia’s return after wrongful deportation, the president simply moved on. On other cases, the administration has grudgingly complied—sometimes with a little public grumbling.

6. Former Aides
Trump has launched investigations into ex-officials like Chris Krebs (his former cybersecurity chief) and Miles Taylor, a.k.a. “Anonymous.” Both are accused of undermining his administration and, in Taylor’s case, even “treason.” It’s a reminder: once you’re out, you’re never really out of Trump’s sights.

7. Hill Republicans
Republicans on Capitol Hill are under pressure to toe the Trump line. Those who don’t risk facing primary opponents bankrolled by Elon Musk, who’s become a bit of a frenemy. Senator Lisa Murkowski summed it up: criticism of Trump comes with political consequences.

8. Kennedy Center
In a never-before-seen move, Trump fired all Democratic board members and appointed himself chairman of the Kennedy Center. He’s even floated the idea of hosting the annual awards himself. Some artists, led by Lin-Manuel Miranda, have already walked out in protest, raising questions about the future of the country’s cultural institutions.

9. Volodymyr Zelenskyy
The Ukrainian president endured a bruising White House meeting, only to be sent packing. Trump, with help from JD Vance, has signaled he might give up on cease-fire negotiations in Ukraine, a move that aligns with Putin’s interests. Yet he continues to blame Ukraine for being the victim of invasion—a plot twist nobody ordered.

That’s the current state of play. Sometimes Trump’s gambits pay off, sometimes not. But there’s no question: the message is clear, and the pace is relentless. For those keeping score, you might need a bigger scorecard.